News you won't see in controlled mainstream media.

20 Ways to Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity.

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a hair dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Some one Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds"

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."

8. Don't use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.......

Send This To Someone To Make Them Smile. Its Called therapy

haha funny stuff <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

bump. I found this really funny. Im going to try a few today

I love this Russ, thanks for sharing!!!! I needed a good laugh today, and the good Lord provided!!!

Sandi
xoxo

Not amused. How can you be so flippant. On what must be the worst day of my life, reading your post has just about pushed me over the edge.

Why did you read it then?
A. Kurmuhjen

I'm sorry you're feeling so bad.

As a former mercury sufferer myself, I realize the value of having a good laugh and this post is not meant to hurt anyone's feeling or to be flippant. It's only meant to help people feel better.

If you're feel bad and need some help, feel free to tell us your story or ask whatever questions you may have so we can help you.

Thanks.

Dont opologise Russ this person is merely practicing the art of being a misery guts & setting her her body & mind up to be ill.
Some people actually enjoy being ill because they dont understand or want to make the effort to find out, they can develop other talents & get nicer attention.
The one that needed the humour most just didnt get.

Regards
Judith

I understand what you're saying, but I also know how difficult it is to be mercury toxic.

Until given a reason to do otherwise, I'll give them the benefit of the doubt and assume that they are experiencing hard times and thought that I was belittling the suffering.

I meant what I said and hope if they are watching and need help, that they will ask for it. Mercury is torturous on the emotions. I do like to laugh though and after receiving this email (the first post in this thread) had to post it because it really was funny (to me anyway).

Thanks for your input.

Judith, .with all due respect. To call someone poisoned like this a "misery guts" looking for attention is possibly one of the worst things you could ever suggest to someone suffering like this. I realise how it can come across, but unless you have been poisoned mentally by a toxin (mercury especially), you will have aboslutely no conception of the total hell on earth it is.

I have been through it, so I know it well and the alteration of the person's mind and personality and outlook is profound. The very fact some are even on this forum is commendable. The very fact some even get up out of bed is commendable.

This type of illness can cause direct suicidal urges on the brain. Many take their own lives. They are far from negative or self pitying, I call them heroic. If I had not been through it (or going through it), I wonder whether I'd have the same attitude?

Russ, no offense, I know your post was intended to lift some spirits and give a little humor. But you know as I do, what this poison can do! No explanation necessary to those that have been through it.

Well, regardless of our position, let's stay polite and expect the best from each other. I know that some on this forum in the past have had "outbursts" and I attributed it to mercury, and so it's OK. We need to be tolerant of these types of emotions when people are mercury toxic.

I just have a very "dry" sense of humor so I hope people can find some humor in what I posted. It was from an email that I received from the person that does out Spanish translation (if I remember correctly). He often sends me really funny emails.

I especially like the last line:

"Send This To Someone To Make Them Smile. It's Called therapy".

Know what you mean, Russ, my sense of humor is so dry I have to water it twice a day.
And when you said somewheres else about more time for yourself, all work and no play makes Russ a dull boy, nobody wants that.
Y'all are doing a grand job, take a day off!

pmsl, this is priceless!

I love the idea of mosquito netting all over my work station while playing tropical music..hehee.., that would be a blast seeing everyone's reactions. !

My heart does go out to any who are having a bad day however,-- as the anonymous poster mentioned that the post had a negative effect on them. I also feel that this reaction is mercury related and I encourage them to continue reading the other posts- as there will always be something that will also encourage them . They can come back to this post later --and it may make them smile later
hang in there!
Boldyloxx (Lisa)