SoSick I was being sarcastic . . . if you honestly believe that you get the things you want because you are closer to God than the rest of us, then . . . well, thanks for the amusement anyway. I take it that the people here who have been ill for years aren't very close to him either, including those who profess to be just as fervently Christian as you. You'd better go tell them what they're doing wrong and re-wire their hotlines to God because they seem to be malfunctioning.

Elvis, I agree absolutely. Or at least I used to. If you've got your priorities right, know what you are capable of and set yourself reasonable goals, then you can usually work to achieve them. I've hit a road block these past 3 years the like of which I've never encountered before and I'm pretty amazed at how stuck I've been. Hopefully things will start to improve soon.

SoSick, I do have a trade, I teach high school English. What's stopping me from getting a job? One, when I worked as a teaching assistant last autumn, the damage from the antidepressant withdrawal was still too much and I got sick and had to quit. I've been keeping an eye out for part-time teaching jobs since then, with fewer hours, where I know when I'm in my own classroom I will not have to sit through a lesson of screaming kids. It isn't through lack of trying, the part-time jobs just aren't out there. I looked for stop-gap jobs in shops too but I didn't get interviews, presumably because I am overqualified.

However I keep looking, and trying to think of possibilities, because I feel this is totally in my hands and I need to sort it out. I don't think any amount of praying to any deity is going to do it for me.

Linda.